My journey as an artist began ten years ago as I entered the local art school for a week-long summer course called Finding Your Artistic Voice. I was a complete beginner. Except for a few attempts with watercolor, I had never painted before and barely knew upside down on the paint brush.
I found my true calling
On day two I realised I had finally found my calling. My results were nothing to brag about, but I loved the creative process. It was a very intense and hot summer week with deep diving into inner landscapes, lovely lunches outside and refreshing swimming in the river with new friends.
The teacher was a well known artist who sometimes gave me a creepy feeling as she laughed at my beginner attempts at colour mixing and criticised my way of using the paintbrush. Therefore I somehow didn’t think the teacher was walking the talk, but she kind of saw right through me and I was strongly encouraged to enter the two year art program. And for that I am forever grateful.
A gift from my family
The summer course was a birthday gift from my family. My husband and my son witnessed the immediate impact this creative week course had on my wellbeing, so the following month I enrolled as an art student, finally at the age of 50. Looking back I regret not doing this years ago, but life has been filled with other things.
The following two years my learning curve was steep as I had spent most of my life fulfilling others expectations, not listening to my inner self. They say there is a crack in everything, and that is where the light gets in. I don’t know who I’d be without my creative practice. Entering my studio is like coming home on a deeper level.
For years I worked full time jobs and made art during evenings, weekends and holidays. I hardly had any energy to meet friends, and my poor family only saw me during meals and when I fell asleep on the sofa totally worn out. I have no idea how many movies I slept through while my tea got cold.
Working two careers is demanding, and as my everyday life started to feel like a mountain to climb, and I began to feel dead inside, I realised I had to change my priorities and went for less stressful day jobs. Over the years I have spent long hours of hard work alone in the studio to push my art forward. Years of poor income have taught me not to spend money.
Never stop dreaming
To me being an artist means quite a few sacrifices. We only have 24 hours and 7 days a week. I plan my days well in order to accomplish what I want. Artist life is sometimes stressful, but I’ll never stop trying to fulfil my dream.
Trusting my inner voice has been a hard trial, guess I wasn’t brave enough to listen, maybe I was told I wasn’t good enough too often. When you feel your life is too small for you it’s time to make a leap! Time to unfold! Trust your inner voice, it demands to be heard!
10 years and 10 000 hours later
They say you need about 10 000 hours of practice to become really good at something. My art practice has covered several trials and errors, exploration, failure and happy coincidences. I have painted small and big, painted over again and sold a few. I have taken workshops, had exhibitions, even attended a third year at the local art school. I’ve learnt techniques and made loads of paintings in different styles, but I’m still searching.
10 years later I am eager to find my true artistic voice. But when the student is ready, the teacher will appear! So I carry on.
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